good habits.

good morning las vegas.

good morning wireless electronic land...

spent the last hour or two watching apple how to videos for osx. what is funny to me is that the video help is so retarded, if people can not figure those particular things out all on their lonesomes, why buy a mac?

well no. i can understand. used to work at apple store... way back when... and some people really are just .... well.

this week i wanted to be exceptionally productive. however, i find the more i have in my head that i want to get out and want to do, the less i actually do. then i get a panic attack. scramble to make something. then tear it up. or trash and delete it. then make something new, then throw it away. the past two days have been this way. hm.

how

ever.

i seem to be finding a balance at maintaining good habits this week.

no urges for pain killers or any of the such. even though my crooked spine hurts like hell and is keeping me up all hours... but the clarity that has returned is so much more enjoyable.

watched a documentary last week.... called.... well. don't remember the name.

it was by carl sagan.

what i found to be the most interesting is that the information they taught us solemn human beings with in the early 80's late 70's regarding time and space, galaxies, super novas and the beginning of time... the information is relatively the same today....

meaning A). we have figured it all out back then. and were set.

or much more likely,

B). our race is much more interested in spending money for fighting other humans, killing in the name of something to be regarded to make sense. the human race would much rather dump cash into sports and hollywood, .... the list can really go on here...

we have spent virtually nothing into the research of the ground breaking ideas and truths we discovered back then about the cosmos, time/space, the universe and how there is actually proof we exist within everything.... why ?

it just boggles my head.. but not really i guess.

we are destined for brutality and cruelty, no?

destruction.

of others.

even to ourselves.

so lets take comfort in the ideology of jesus christ or what other zeus you believe in, and not think about the scary idea we are just an equation in a larger pond of life.

..

praise the lord.(s).

-m